Friday, April 16, 2010

Go lower to go higher

these past few weeks have been extremely hard and challenging. on top of thesis deadline, assignments deadlines, looking for internship, studying for my final 3 papers of my entire deg program, things concerning the relational part of my life didnt get easier.. i won't elaborate coz its under the Blood of Jesus, but through all of this, i've learn 1 big big lesson: in order to go higher, you have to go lower. all because i have accepted the dream that takes a lifetime- leadership (j.Maxwell) and throughout the process of reading this amazing book, i did pray b4, that i want to experience and be conscious of everything i am reading. God heard me, and brought many parts of the book to life.

Maxwell summarizes it here:
1. it's not the dream of a lifetime; it's the dream that takes a lifetime.
2. it takes time to grow as a leader.
3. it takes trials to grow as a leader.
4. it takes God's help to grow as a leader.

...so... hehehe
at the moment, i do feel defeated, sad, frustrated, impatient, feel that i havent done enough, feel helpless and empty. But not without hope, faith and love ;) Thank God, there is still faith, hope and love. Faith that God knows best and works all things out for good; Hope that all things will INDEED work out for and according to God's purpose; and love, for the way God loves me and how i want to love people around me the way He does. No, i've not given up; and i sure hope i will never. But i'm just pausing for a moment, to see whats happening and asking God how to get through this. my presence of mind will be back soon ;)

Dear God,
If my heart has grown cold, there You love will unfold, as You open my eyes to the work of your hands. When Im blind to my way, there Your spirit will pray, as You open my eyes to the work of Your hands. Heal my heart and make it clean, open up my eyes to the things unseen, show me how to love like You have loved me! Break my heart for what breaks Yours, everything i am for Your kingdom's cause as i walk from earth into eternity. Help me to become a better leader, Lord. Reveal the dream You have for my life. PLace i in my heart, and re-kindle my passion for it! While You help me to grow, teach me to embrace the whole development process. Give me patience when i need it and passion when it's appropriate. Teach me to look beyond my life and desires. And when I'm ready, show me the big picture as You did for Joseph!I love You Lord, and so i'll pass it on.

1 comment:

Josephine Ng said...

Preach it my dear!! :)