You make all things new~

here was 2008, walking and stumbling on these shadowfeet. I've been changing to be less and less asleep, made of different stuff than when i began.

Definately made of different stuff than when i first began. Too much has been going on recently till a point that felt like dropping it all and disappearing off to somewhere else..far away from the noise and sinking thoughts. But thats only for cowards i guess. This year was also a year of letting go of everything..literally. Things, people, places, incidences and emotions. I've being doing so much of letting go until i feel that i didnt want anything anymore. I dont want anything!! Coz i know i'd have to let go anyway..

so.. things that i want to thank God for 2008..

1. Good exam results.. this is a miracle! Through the ridiculously tight schedule of classes, visitations, cgs, and family..God still came through with me~ gilaaa chun!
2. WHC Children Ministry that has FINALLY become a Children Church!! wooohooo Thank God for every child, parent, teacher, helper, worship leaders and musicians that He had brought into this place.
3. WHC Youth Ministry> The Metamorphosis Project.. that the children that are growing into the teens now have a larger group to grow with and wonderful leaders to lead them to becoming super lovers of Jesus.
4. Open doors> ooportunity to serve with World Vision. More to come babe!
5. Closed doors.
6. My holiday job at Scotiabank.. great boss, great collegues, great experience!
7. My sis is going home to stay once a week!
8. Thank my grdma and aunt for sacrificing so much to let me go to love others.
9. Mummy, just for being my mummy.
10. Friends, that have been there although they don't and maybe will never be able to understand what has been going on with me. That they don't judge me for mistakes but give grace and support.
11. People who i have regarded as unofficial mentors.. ie Ps. Ong! that have spoken many truths into my life.
12. Challenges that have made me stronger.
13. Victories that have excouraged me to do better.
14. Thank God that He nudged me let go all those stuff that would have prevented all those things above to work out..

and these are my resolutions.. inspired by R. Emerson and E.Porter

1. to laugh often and much
2. to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children
3. to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends
4. to appreciate beauty.
5. to find the best in others and to praise them loudly for it.
6. to make the world a better place whether by a happier child or senior person or a redeemed social condition.
7. to know even one life has breathed easier because I lived and loved.
8. to love generously as how Jesus would.
9. to live fully the life God created me to live.

I thank God for loving me and for teaching me to love others more and that life goes beyond just yourself.

here is 2009, full of faith, hope, love, expectation, enthusiasm, peace and joy! I;m coming to GET YOU!

有些事我只想要对你说, 因祢比任何人都爱我..

"有些事我只想要对你说, 因祢比任何人都爱我.."
(there are things that i only want to say to you, because You are the ONe who loves me the most)

this phrase changed my life forever. so often i tend to look back and wonder what is it that makes me want to live OUT my passion and not just settle for complacency or second best. its not because of the things that i have or havent done, not because of my past achievements or what i have done right. you might understand when i say that past mistakes might make you feel inadequate or undeserving a good life. but what happens if i say that even the good things that you did RIGHT also might STILL leave you empty inside.

this changed when i heard this fact. knowing that there is something and someone higher than me that knows me inside out and lvoes me for who I am, not for what i have or have not done. Nothing i can or cannot do can make God love me more. Ofcourse I want to make Him happy by living honourably and with integrity. But for those who dont, He loves them the same, not anymore than me.

Another song that resonated so much with me is "I Will Be Here" by Steven Curtis Chapman. This song made a very very deep impression in me from the very first time i heard it nearly 7 years ago. The viewpoint of this song is a husband singing to the wife. This song taught me so much above what true love is. For one, its not just about romantic love, but true love gives assurance, comfort, safety, understanding, patience, faithful during trials and tribulations, rejoies in accomplishments, comforting in failures and giving grace to mistakes. True love also stays strong together in seasons of change and transition, loving each other even when the mirror tells us we're older and most of all ,thanking God for the wonderful person He prepared for you.

My point is.. the love the husband has for his wife showed me how much God loves me. This love runs deep. Ive posted another version of it sung by Passion (dont know if its his real name) awesome stuff ..

Best photos for this season...

To all the people i love.. hope you are all doing great.. more updates soon ! LOve YOU!

Good question..do answer ya

What would you think or feel if you knew that someone had you in mind since before the Foundations of the World. He loved you before the beginning of time, has come for you, and now calls you to journey toward and with the person, for the consummation of your love?

Do drop your comments.. just want to know how you would feel or think..

Gish's 22nd birthday

I didnt know wer to put this.. if put on facebook, then will be like 0 privacy.. so decided to put here la.. Open for viewing of all fishes and non-fishes alike =)

We will find each other =)

Pic: Beautiful sunset on my birthday 28 Oct 08, taken approx at 6.15pm at Sentosa Island. This pic means a thousand words to me =)

Finalleeeee... blog update. as i was reading one of the pieces from my then 'private' journal, i found this very interesting piece that i wrote on 12 Jul 07... time has flown pass since then.. and i thought i might be old enough and ok to share a bit on my outlook of what it means to me to have a lifepartner =) i seldom talk about this in public, hehe, so this is quite a bit step for me ya~ if you're looking for any juicy details, im sorry ya.. there is none. so its ok if you stop reading the rest of my blog.. but maybe if you do want to get to know me a bit more.. im here.

so.. welcome to my world on 12 July 2007>>

12 Jul 2007

Given much thought, what I can conclude till this day is that finding a life partner or one that I would fondly refer to as my team mate that would fulfill all the qualities and I mentioned above (previous journal..not gonna give you the details la..=P) is rather.. difficult? I guess. But deep down I know that it isn’t impossible though. Because if I had never met a person with one or more of those qualities, I wouldn’t have as much of an idea as I do now, on knowing what kind of person I would want to spend the rest of my life on earth with. It might not be that one person with all those qualities, but different people, each with their uniquely good qualities. Haha. Actually it’s a combination of those different people that bring about a ‘collection’ of qualities. That of what makes the best match.

Based on just this, one might be tempted to think : “Then, can I have them all?”. That’s ridiculous! Of course NOT. What are you thinking? Pengsan! So, I guess, that in finding a team mate, I’ve accepted the fact that the point is not on finding the perfect mate, but the best match to those qualities. If we’re looking for perfection, we’re bound for disappointment because we’ll never ever find it. Think rationally and moderately and you’ll agree with this.

Hehe. This is indeed an interesting topic.. Last night at cell group, my friend shared her testimony on relationships she’d had and lost. Some were very close friends, tuition mates, church friends, school friends.. they all varied. Many times you thought that it was going to work out, but eventually didn’t. Then she turned around and asked God, why was this happening to me. I guessed that at some point, we do give in to peer pressure, that we get nervous and impatient when we see that all those around us are already in relationships, some even getting married, and we hadn’t even been one steady relationship yet.

Many guys have crossed my path, come and gone. Many have impacted my life in one way or the other, for the better or for worse. So, is it that my expectations exceed reality? Am I looking for the impossible? Looking back again on the top most of this post, I will confidently say, No, I’m quite rational about this. It’s not impossible. I just haven’t met that person yet. Or even if I have, I haven’t got to know the person well enough to discover those qualities in him. So, the conclusion is yet.. the same. Time will tell. At the same time, Father God, do mold me to be the kind of person with the kind of qualities that that person is looking for to be his team player.

This way, I believe that we will indeed find each other =)

the power statement about Beauty

i just came across this wonderful statement

“Beauty overwhelms us, enchants us, fascinates us, and calls us.” (Fr. Andrew Greeley)

The gift of presence is a rare and beautiful gift.

To come unguarded, undistracted, and be fully present and fully engaged with the one whom we are with.

Have you noticed in reading the Gospels that people enjoyed being around Jesus?

They wanted to be near him – to share a meal, take a walk, have a lingering conversation.

It was the gift of his presence.

When you were with him, you felt he was offering you his heart.

When we offer our unguarded presence, we live like Jesus.

And we invite others to do the same.

(Captivating, 138)

Through the years, i've come to learn a very inportant thing about beauty.. to me..

Beauty is underrated, true beauty is being exploited, and beauty is anything but skin deep.

Beauty reminded me of one of my FAVOURITE Disney cartoon of all times, Sleeping Beauty.. she was ofcourse extreamly beauty, (as the animators have drawn) but since then, something within me knws that there MUST be so much more to this beauty.. she has so much more to offer. God's beauty is reflected in all these.. through the many wonderfully beautiful things around, we have just seen just a teeny weeny fraction of God's beauty..

Great people Great moments Great God in our midsts

haha i taktahan but need to naikkan this photos just for laughs and for memories sake.. these are few of my happiest moments amidst all the other chaoses in my life =)

At Caleb and Mabel's Wedding =)

Actually we were more interested in the flowers~
One of our 1st networkees group fotos.. one of the pros: we take great photos together =P Things we do at weddings "-_-
Supposed to be an emo- Top Model type of pose.. but Connie and Mary were not cooperating!

After countless retakes.. we finally got the best non-shake portrait. You have no idea how much effort was put in for this..

Jac's Bday at Ampang Korean BBQ

A Peeping Jac.. its like.. the rest if her face is the car seat.. muahahahMichi hugs Lydia.. and Jo can't stand it.. either that or she's desperate to get in the fotoNegotiating whether to let Jo take photos with us. Michi says no, but Lydia says "its ok la.. pity her"Finally we still let her take foto with us.. if not we wudnt have taken such a nice foto =)Taking a rest after eating too much too fastAfter reconciling over a meal, Jo and Michi became good friends.Until can smile while sleeping... =)Presenting..the bday gal.. Shes 2nd from the right, her name is Jaclyn and shes is X yrs old the day b4 we took this pic.Mr Camera man joined the fotoJo spotted a cicak! But we cared more about taking nice pics Michi loves Batman!Then the rest spotted many other cicaks.. Michi grew metal extensions on her ears.The food was finger..and chopticks lickin' good =)Cheers! Barly water

Lalalala tomoro is my 1st real holiDAY.. yes only one day

hey lovely humans.. i suddenly feel like i miss many people.. missed out on a lots of important events.. missed out on a very big chunck of LIFE. blame it on the exams la!!

these are a few of my regrets:

1. not being able to join the Chong Hws High School 3rd Scout Troop Reunion

2. not being able to spend time with TCC b4 she went back to Cardiff

3. not being able to spend time with LLH thru the harder times in life

4. not being able to spend time with my CG and section mbrs.. i sooo miss them

5. not learning up on my Photoshop shop skills (even wen iv installed cs2 like.. 5months ago)

6. not able to start learning drums again.. (even wen i have 2 new pais of sticks)

7. not reading the newspapers for 8 months

8. not replying enough emails as in should

9. not washing my car when it needs to be washed (you have NO IDEA)

10. not getting enough sleep

11. not spending enough time with God. ( i almost ALWAYS keep Him waiting, i would be so sien of myself if i were Him, so thank goodness im not)
12. not spending enough time with my family (padahal they will always have time for me =( )

13. not living in the moment

well..these are just a few of my greatest regrets.. you people in my life mean SO SO SO much to me. its absolutely true, even if i dont show it. i'll be working on it guys.. i promise =)

other things that have made headlines in my life recently are Connie's bday, UCSI CF CPR, and CF G.O. Camp.. pictures are everywer guys.. i cant keep track also.. do log on to facebook.com for almost all of the pics..

im pretty fine now. after spending almost 2months in the 'desert' alone... with God. things that i've learn in the desert are:

1. to attempt to change the world without changing ourselves is a hopeless task

2. Jesus not only invites us to a new beginning, but also offers us a NEW LIFE and a NEW HEART.

3. The desrt adventure is for those who are committed to being a voice to, and not merely and echo of, the society.

4. The desert produces real people

5. In the pain i have found purpose, in the suffering i have learn perseverence, and in the loneliness i have met Jesus.

6. In order to lean on Him, we must first acknowledge that we cannot walk by ourselves.

God met me at my lowest point. I was LITERALLY all alone in these pass 2 months. I still thank God for dearest friends who have been there for me.. when i met the car accident, who took me to the workshops, who accompanied me to study for my finals for ridiculous amount of hours, who offered a shoulder to lean on, and ears to listen to me complain about life.. God bless u guys and gals!! I know it is by NO accident that you were where you were during that time. All sent by God for me, no matter what you have done. Even by just being there, you have helped me and are a great encouragement to me. THANK YOU ALL.. Love you soo much!

勇敢

約 書 亞 記 1 (Joshua 1)
5 你 平 生 的 日 子 ， 必 无 一 人 能 在 你 面 前 站 立 得 住 。 我 怎 样 与 摩 西 同 在 ， 也 必 照 样 与 你 同 在 ； 我 必 不 撇 下 你 ， 也 不 丢 弃 你 。

6 你 当 刚 强 壮 胆 ！ 因 为 你 必 使 这 百 姓 承 受 那 地 为 业 ， 就 是 我 向 他 们 列 祖 起 誓 应 许 赐 给 他 们 的 地 。

7 只 要 刚 强 ， 大 大 壮 胆 ， 谨 守 遵 行 我 仆 人 摩 西 所 吩 咐 你 的 一 切 律 法 ， 不 可 偏 离 左 右 ， 使 你 无 论 往 那 里 去 ， 都 可 以 顺 利 。

8 这 律 法 书 不 可 离 开 你 的 口 ， 总 要 昼 夜 思 想 ， 好 使 你 谨 守 遵 行 这 书 上 所 写 的 一 切 话 。 如 此 ， 你 的 道 路 就 可 以 亨 通 ， 凡 事 顺 利 。

9 我 岂 没 有 吩 咐 你 麽 ？ 你 当 刚 强 壮 胆 ！ 不 要 惧 怕 ， 也 不 要 惊 惶 ； 因 为 你 无 论 往 那 里 去 ， 耶 和 华 ─ 你 的 　 神 必 与 你 同 在 。

"Desert Song" by Fraser

This is my prayer in the battle, when trimph is still on its way,
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ, so firm on His promise I'll stand.

All of my life, in every season, YOU are still God,
I have a reason to sing, I have a reason to worship!!

In Joshua 1, God told Joshua REPEATEDLY to be strong and of good courage, be strong and courageous, for He WILL be with him wherever he goes. 你 当 刚 强 壮 胆 ！ 不 要 惧 怕 ， 也 不 要 惊 惶 ； 因 为 你 无 论 往 那 里 去 ， 耶 和 华 ─ 你 的 　 神 必 与 你 同 在 .

Even while being stuck in this narrow place yet again, in the the battle with the Enemy for my life, my money, and my future..one thing remains.. I have a promise that I will NOT be left alone.

Bleeding Love by Mark & Chelsea (So You Think You Can Dance)

love the choreography for Bleeding Love.. dancers Mark & Chelsea are greatt!

and Will & Katee doing Pas De Deux, dancing to Imagine by David Archuleta

PASSION World Your 2008

Hia hia hia! Passion is finally here!! 3 Aug08 can't wait mann.. so kanchiong on what God's gonna do.. He's gonna show up we'll all be blown away yet again. Yeshh! Hearts are gonna touched, lives restored, sickness and diseases banished, people are going to experience a love so great they have never heard or known!

then im thinking, cheh.. it should be happening everyday and not just in a concert or conference. But then again, this is a good chance with good music and a great atmosphere!! hehe i can't wait =P go here: http://www.268generation.com

de:of sire:the father

These pics were taken at the Rumah Hope's open day. last pic taken with Hock Pung and Chee Wai- 2 of the many most beautiful children in my life. ohh! and i got a face-painting too, just INCASE you didnt' notice =)

here's a few quotes from BillJohnson's Supernatural Power Of The Transformed Mind.. ( now u all know why i liked Transformers so much!! i love anythingto do with Kingdom stuff) haha i feel its too precious and awesome not to share.. ask me if you don't know what I'm talking about =P

• Sometimes we think that if we really desire something, it must not be from God. It's as if we serve barbaric God who wants to wipe out anything that springs from our own hearts. On the contrary, God is enamored of your desires. He wants to see what makes you tick. That's where pleasure is derived, when dreams and desires spark dialogue and interaction, and the co-labouring begins!



• Co-labouring is a huge aspect of ministry that many of us simply don't understand, because true friendship with God is so foreign to us.



• We don't dream independent of God, but because of Him. There IS room for our desires, creativity and ideas.



• He essentially said, "I'm going to give you one huge idea, and I want it to shape every breath of your life, every bit of ministry, every prayer. The idea is: 'On earth as it is in heaven'. Now, go! Run with it. Make it happen."



• God trusts the heart of a man who is lost in friendship with Him. As we come into intimacy with Him, more of what takes place is a result of our desires..



• 'I see what moves the Father, and I allow what moves HIM to set MY course'.



• The work we do with God bears our imprints and His. That's why even the present outpourings and revivals taking place across the world have completely different manifestations but the same Holy Spirit because they flow through people with different gifting, personalities, relationships, and cultural settings.



• Dreaming with God unlocks deep reservoirs of creativity in each and every person, in different areas of gifts and talent.



• Religion, cruel and boring, bottles up the creative impulse God has out inside of every person. We're descendants of the Creator and yet we stick to old, tired, and boring methods. We ask God to do a new thing through us, but expect Him to do it in a familiar way.



• UNfortunately, religion has programmed us to shut down anything that might be a personal desire, so we let the world around us do the dreaming, and we draft into their dream.

phewww some solid stuff to chew on for the week or so.. TA~

Just for fun: Backstreet Boys Live in M'sia 2008

forgot i had these pics =P really miss those more carefree times! thanks for the tics Lam and Robin!! Everybody..yea.. rock your body..yea.. everybody.. rock your body right..

BACKSTREET'S BACK ALRITE!! (*a bit delayed tho =P)